Today’s Review: Travel Toiletry Bottles

I’ve recently started doing an overnight shift at work, which means once a week I need to pack up all the stuff I need to make me clean of a morning. Now, the thing about toiletries is that they tend to come in large bottles, which makes perfect sense in the home, but not much in a travel situation. Thankfully you can pick up tiny bottles from pretty much any pound shop and distill your favourite lotions and potions into them in small amounts. Simple, yet so effective. Of course, their primary use is to circumvent the arbitrary 100ml rule imposed by airports after 9/11, but in all honesty it’s just better to be able to carry a small amount of shower gel and shampoo for a one or two night stay. Tiny bottles are a fantastic invention.

My rating: 5/5

Today's Review: Naipo Portable Massager Seat Cushion

I was recently sent another product from Naipo, purveyor of some pretty fine massager products. Here we have a vibrating seat cushion, which is a little bigger than the others I've reviewed, but one I was excited to try out. This cushion contains eight vibrating massage points, as well a heat function, because heat is always good. Portability is the main selling point with the cushion, as it even comes with a car charger in the box.

Well, portable it is, it's very slimline, I'm surprised they've managed to fit all the vibration and heat pads into such a small space, while still making it comfortable to sit on. The cushion is easy to fold up, and comes equipped with straps to make it easy to put onto any seat you desire. Or you could just lay it down in the bed and do it that way, it's very versatile.

So let's get down to the massage itself. This cushion comes equipped with a rather comprehensive remote, which provides a lot of options. You can choose to focus on one or many of the four areas, so you can go for purely upper back, or just turn on everything and get all over vibration. There are also preset programs, which cycle through the areas, ramping up in intensity and slowing down, and just leaving the cushion to do its stuff lets it cycle through every program and gives good all over coverage. You can turn the heat on and off, change the speed of vibration, there's as much versatility in the remote as there is in the cushion itself.

I really like this cushion, you can put it pretty much anywhere, and it's slimline enough to pack away when not in use. The remote has a wide variety of options, and it provides a pretty decent massage. What I would say is that this doesn't give as deep a massage as other products, there are no kneading nodes, it's pure vibration. But what this lacks in deep tissue massage, it makes up for in portability and versatility. I've tried a couple of massage cushions before, and this one is a fantastic lightweight option.

My rating: 5/5

Buy the Naipo portable seat cushion here, and use the code V4KHMGBK for a further £10 off until 30/04/2018

You can also use the code R9PW4VRC to get £20 off this massager pillow until 30/04/2018, bringing the price down to £9.99

Today's Review: Naipo Shiatsu Back, Neck & Shoulder Massager

The good folks at Naipo sent me this massager to try out a little while back, and it was extremely difficult to say no, since my back and shoulders ache a lot of the time. I've tried out Naipo's pillow massager before, but this one seemed more geared towards getting right into those shoulder and neck crevices, so I was pretty excited to try it out.

Basically, the massager itself consists of two sets of rolling nodes, which change rotation direction every minute while it's switched on. Those long straps there are for putting your arms in, allowing you to position and hold down the massager on the area you want, with the amount of pressure you desire. This is a welcome change from the pillow massager, which was just dependent on how hard you lean on it, although it is a bit awkward sticking your arms through the straps, I'd say it's a pretty decent way to emulate what being a T-Rex was like, while getting a massage. Still, it's pretty easy to change position and pull down with your hands to provide more pressure, so it's a decent trade off for a more precise massage.

Here's the main control panel, situated on one of the straps. It offers a lot more options than the pillow massager, in a very intuitive way. You can change the rotation of the nodes whenever you like, so you don't have to wait for the automatic minute change to kick in. You can also turn the heat on and off to your preference, though I don't see why anyone would want to turn it off, it's nice and toasty. Finally, the bottom button changes the speed of the rotation, ranging from a gentle to a pretty damn intense rub. The range of options is pretty great, but with where the panel is situated on the strap, it is a bit of a pain to change the settings while you've got your arms in the straps.

This is a very decent massager with a lot of great options, and it also comes with a car charger, so you can get that massage on the go. I'd suggest not sticking your arms through the straps while driving though, I imagine a T-Rex wouldn't do well at steering. Maybe this is one for the passenger seat. So yes, a lovely piece of kit, that gets right into those tricky aching areas. I've been using it quite a lot, and it provides a good amount of relief. The guys at Naipo have given me a voucher code to share with you guys, so you can get 10% off if you want to buy this massager. Just use the code LWDUJGW5 at checkout.

My rating: 4/5

Buy the Naipo Shiatsu Back, Neck & Shoulder Massager here

Use code LWDUJGW5 for 10% off

Check out more Naipo products here

Today's Review: Haribo Pick 'N' Mix Machine

At the base of the stairs it called me. The sound of children's laughter, followed by that classic theme. "Kids and grown ups love it so, the happy world of Haribo." Yes! I'm a grown up, and I love it so! This monstrosity of a vending machine drew me in from the start, and I was sold when I saw what was on offer. It's a pick 'n' mix machine, whereby you pay £3, choose up to five sweets from the selection, and watch as tiny conveyor belts fill up the cup before your eyes. £3 was a little steep for a pick 'n' mix cup, but look at that selection! Terrific Turtles! Crocodiles! You can't get bags of them easily around here. Also, there were some rhubarb & custard flavoured pencil things that looked utterly amazing, so I tapped my phone and watched this thing go to work. Did I mention that it takes Apple Pay? This is truly the machine of the future.

At least it would be if it worked. You know those rhubarb & custard sweets I was aching for? Turns out that specific conveyor belt didn't work, so I only got the other four selection in my cup. Of course, I only knew this after I'd paid. My friend also got a cup, which was utterly devoid of jelly cherries due to a blockage, and his cup was only three quarters full at the end. It seems like this thing requires a lot of maintenance, the concept is good, but maybe it's just a bit too ridiculous to function. 

Oh, and also the sweets are stale. It turns out leaving unwrapped Haribo sitting on conveyor belts in a not entirely airtight vending machine means they're not the freshest when they're eventually chosen to fall into a cardboard cup. I mean, I ate them, but they were very dry and firm. This is a flashy vending machine with a lot of flaws, designed to reel in kids and suckers. I was one of those suckers, but let this be a warning to the rest of you. Don't get drawn in by the happy music, just go and buy a bag of Starmix instead.

My rating: 1/5

Today's Review: AUKEY Aroma Diffuser

I was recently sent this diffuser by AUKEY to try out, I can't say I've ever used one before, but it was intriguing enough to get me to have a go. For those of you who may not know (I wasn't particularly knowledgeable), this little device humidifies the air, you fill it with water, and out comes a fine mist. Adding essential oils into the mix can release some lovely aromas, which can make the place smell nice, amd give some added benefits. Now, I've never used another diffuser to compare this one to, but I have to say this is a very well made piece of kit. It's small, sleek, and easy to operate. It comes with everything you need in the box, including a little measuring jug to fill it up with. Basically, all you do it fill it with water, plug it in, and turn it on, you're good to go.

Here it is in action. You may see the fine jet of mist coming out of the top, if you can look past that lovely warm glow. Yes, this doubles as a light, and there are seven colours to choose from, which shine with varying intensities. You could probably find a light setting for anything you wish, from a calming atmosphere to a brilliant white you could probably read by. There are a few little buttons on the front, but they're all very simple and self explanatory. Aside from the light, you can change the setting on the mist itself, as well as setting a timer of one, two or three hours, or choosing continuous use. It's nice setting this up before you go to sleep, knowing it will shut off after an allotted time. Even so, if you set it to continuous, it will shut off when it runs out of water, so there are no worries whatsoever.

So besides the aesthetics and function, does it actually work? Well, I spent some times experimenting with a few oils, and I must say this does a good job. A few drops of orange helped to clear the smell in the kitchen from some forgotten potatoes, and some eucalyptus helped to clear my stuffy nose overnight, as well as providing a pleasant atmosphere for sleep. This is another appliance I can see myself using very regularly, it's nice to be able to get some nice aromas going throughout the house with minimal effort. This diffuser is definitely worth a buy. Amazon Prime Day is happening soon, so look out for discounts on AUKEY products at the beginning of July.

My rating: 5/5

Buy the AUKEY Aroma Diffuser here

Today's Review: Aglaia Closet Light

Last week I reviewed the Aglaia floor lamp, and now I bring you their closet light, which I was sent earlier this week. It's an LED light with a magnetic strip that can be placed in your closets or small spaces to brighten things up a bit. We recently converted one of our cupboards into a walk in wardrobe for the kids, so this light sounded like exactly what I needed.

Yup, there you go. This light is compact, but it packs a lot of power. The LEDs give a brilliant warm white light , and is angled nicely so it doesn't attack the eyes. On the back is an adhesive magnetic strip which sticks to the wall, and then the light can be removed for charging. That's right, no wall socket needed, it comes with a USB cable so you can charge the battery up for two hours of light, which can last a while if you're just ducking in and out of a closet.

That's where the beauty of this thing really shines through. This light contains sensors to minimise energy use in every situation. Aside from the main power switch, there's also a light sensor, so it only lights up when it's dark enough. The front also has a motion sensor, which turns the light on as soon as I move towards it, and shuts it off pretty soon after I'm out of range. So yeah, this closet light is pretty perfect. It's bright, easy to attach, and energy efficient. It's just what I needed to light up my space, and I'm sure it would do for most others as well.

My rating: 5/5

Buy the Aglaia closet light here

Today's Review: Aglaia Floor Lamp

I recently received this floor lamp from Aglaia, an appliance company with quite a few products for sale on Amazon. I've dabbled in lamps around the house before, but none have survived the changes in decor, or have ended up battered along the way. Let's see if this one is any different.

At first I was surprised by how small the box was that the lamp came in, it turns out some assembly is required. Thankfully, that assembly is easy. The wire goes from the plug all the way to the lamp head, and you simply have to screw the pieces of stand together. Easy to assemble, but also easy to disassemble, so it would easily survive a move, or being put into storage.

So here's the lamp in all its glory, and I have to say, I love the design. There's a base, a stand, and the lamp head, and that's it. It's very sleek and minimalist, and once the pieces are all screwed together they all sit very flush, and it looks like one pieces of metal. It would probably fit in with pretty much any decorating style, and it doesn't take up much space at all. 

But enough about the looks, how is it as a lamp? Well, the minimalist design carries over to function as well, extremely simple but effective. There's a touch sensitive button on top of the lamp head, which turns the lamp on at the slightest touch. Simply touch the button again to cycle through three levels of brightness, and to switch off. The picture up there shows it at the lowest brightness level, which is pretty nice, and once you kick it up a notch you can really shed some light on the situation. Har har. The light itself is a lovely warm white glow provided by LEDs, so it's low energy and doesn't suffer from flickering or glare. The neck is also very flexible, so it's easily manoeuvred into pretty much any position you want. 

I don't think I could ask for more from a lamp. It looks great, is fantastically easy to operate, and will fit just about anywhere. I can't fault it, this comes with a high recommendation from me. Better still, if you want to buy one over the next week, I've been given a coupon code to share with my readers to knock £7 off the price. A good deal for a great lamp.

My rating: 5/5

Head here to check out the lamp, and enter the code BRDN9RPX to get it for £24.99. The code is valid until May 18th.

Today's Review: Naipo Shiatsu Pillow Massager

My back hurts. I've come to accept it as one of those things, there's just this one spot on my back that hurts when I press it, just underneath my shoulder blade. It's not a debilitating thing, I'm sure some form of professional massage would do it good, but I rarely have the time or money to go out somewhere and have it attended to. I bought a handheld massager a while back, and while it's fairly nice, it requires a lot of effort and manoeuvring to get it to the right spot. I hadn't really considered buying a different form of massager, but I was pretty excited when the folks at Naipo reached out and offered me this pillow massager to try out. 

It's a pillow sized device with two sets of two massaging nodules, which you can place pretty much anywhere to receive a pre-programmed massage. Under the legs, on your neck, or sandwiched between your back and a chair. Not only that, it heats up too, look at that satisfying glow:

So yes, it looks pretty sleek and comfortable, but how does it perform? Well, it's ridiculously easy to use, just plug it in, position it where you want and push the button. Then it'll go to work on its 20 minute program. Basically the nodes rotate in opposing directions, going to town on whatever muscles are in the way. The nodes are a very decent size, and gives a deep rub that gives me that satisfying pain I associate with a good massage. After a minute, the nodes go the opposite way, so it really gets to all those nooks and crannies and gives a nice coverage. The heat builds up to a nice level as well, and all in all it gives a very satisfying massage. Normally after a go with my handheld one, my back is aching for more, but this pillow is easy to get in just the right spot, and after a 20 minute cycle I feel pretty limber and satisfied. 

Here it is attached to a chair, which is also pretty easy. There's an elasticated velcro strap on the back that can be adjusted to fit onto a chair of your choosing. Not only that, it comes bundled with a cigarette lighter attachment, so you can plug it into the car, attach it to your seat and receive a massage while you drive! I haven't tried that one yet, but I'm severely tempted.

I can't fault this massager, it reaches everywhere I need it to, and provides a deep, satisfying massage. I think there's a reason why this is a #1 seller on Amazon, and it's on offer now, so I recommend you grab it. I've been using it daily since I got it, and I'm sure I'll be using it for a long time to come.

My rating: 5/5

Buy the Naipo Shiatsu Pillow Massager here

Check out more Naipo products here

Today's Review: The Lynx Manwasher

I've always wanted to try out the Lynx Manwasher. After all, I am a man, so surely this is the only thing I can wash myself with? Or maybe I'm meant to wash other men with it? I don't know, the name is ambiguous. But in lieu of other men to wash, I washed myself, and I was looking forward to the inevitable burst of testosterone that comes from something with such a manly name.

Well, this is definitely different from the brightly coloured puffs I normally opt for in the shower. Not in a good way, but different. The black puffy bit is slightly soft, but also quite coarse, and the thick chunk of rubber on the other side doesn't allow it much leeway to lather up effectively. I didn't even try the brillo pad looking side, I can only assume that's for when you've grown too manly to have a firmly established outer layer of skin, and want to prove your masculinity by scratching it all off. I'm not much of a fan of this, I guess it will become a little less coarse as I use it more, but I wouldn't recommend it for washing any men with, especially if washing men is a regular pastime. 

My rating: 1/5

Today's Review: Novelty Shaped USB Sticks

I got that neat looking car-shaped memory stick free from a stall in the high street last week. Not only does it look like a car, the wheels turn, and it lights up when you plug it in. Fantastic, right? Well, not really, because its bulky plastic shell makes it mostly useless. It reminded me of another USB stick I acquired some years back, that slightly less bulky Star Wars themed number on the right. It's less obvious with that one, but both suffer from the same problem. You can't fit anything in the port next to where they're plugged in.

I mean, this might be fine for some people. Those who don't make use of all their ports, or who have slots which are placed far apart for some reason. But I tend to have quite a bit of stuff plugged in, in the way of extra USB appliances, ethernet or HDMI cables, and these novelty shaped sticks make plugging these in pretty much impossible. I mean, depending on which side of my laptop I put that car in, it either covers up both the ethernet and headphone ports, or stops me from opening my disc drive. Perhaps not the end of the world, but why should I be facing that problem? Why can't all sticks conform to proper standards of measurement? It may seem like a bit of harmless fun, but it stresses me out. Oh well, I suppose I can do without the paltry 512MB that the car provides. But it didn't have to be this way.

My rating: 1/5

Today's Review: Dyson Airblade Tap

It was just a regular lunch out at a restaurant today, until I went to the toilet, and was greeted by this construction attached to the sink. "That's an odd tap", I thought, washing my hands under the motion activated nozzle at the front, "what are those arms for?" As I turned to find the hand dryer I was greeted with blank walls. At first I figured it was a gross planning error, but quickly the realisation dawned upon me. I turned back to the sink and thrust my hands under those elongated arms. Lo and behold, a rush of air greeted my palms, and my hands emerged dry. This is the Dyson Airblade Tap, and I immediately went out and told everybody that they should go to the toilet and try it out.

It's not an idea I would have thought of, to deal with washing and drying in the same basin. I mean, those soap and water dispensers built into the walls of some public toilets operate that way, but they're invariably rubbish. This, however, is a revelation. It cuts down on wall space for those with little bathroom space, but also saves the problem of looking around or waiting for the hand dryer with dripping wet hands. Everyone gets their own personal hand dryer built into the sink! Well, that's assuming every business wants to shell out over a grand per tap, but with sleek design like this, why wouldn't you? Hopefully these become as ubiquitous as the regular Airblade dryers have in the last few years. It's nice to see Dyson continuing to revolutionise the bathroom. I mean, who knows what's next? Washing and drying your hands at the toilet? I know that sounds gross and unnecessary, but who knows what the future holds. All I know is you should find one of these bad boys and try it out. Great stuff.

My rating: 5/5

Today's Review: Argos Touch Screens

Everyone like a bit of Argos, don't they? They stock all manner of things, and there's no need to browse countless aisles, just look up the number, type it in and someone upstairs does all the leg work for you. It's a winning formula, and it's even better when you can reserve something online and just wander right in and pick it up. But every once in a while I find myself going into Argos without a specific plan of action. Perhaps I want to look something up on the fly, and that is when I am confronted with the horror of the Argos touch screens.

There are two types of commonly used touch screen technologies. There is capacitive, which utilises the electrical current running through your body, and there's resistive, which relies on pressure applied to the screen itself. The Argos touch screen appears to be neither. While I suppose it falls into the latter category, I often find myself pressing down harder than I probably should onto the screen with little visible effect. About one press in five I find a letter appears on the screen, which is a nice sign things are going my way. But when it comes to the space bar you can never tell if you've been successful. The only way to find out is to press hard on another letter, and more often than not I find it appears as an extension of the previous word, forcing me to jam my finger down on the delete button and try all over again. It wouldn't be so bad if there was any visual clue that the button was pushed, but no, it's a static row of letters, watching me silently.

The only reason I can think of as to why these screens are so useless is that it's a thinly veiled attempt to fight back against the rising tide of technological advance. If I can't work the touch screen, I'm more likely to talk to an employee, or flick through the massive, plentiful catalogues that they still insist on churning out at an alarming rate. But even if I use the catalogue and want to check stock, I still have to use the touch screen, and it's infuriating. I suppose I should give it at least some credit, I can actually get the job done. It's just I don't highly rank a screen that gives me sore finger tips after a minute of use. Sort it out, Argos.

My rating: 1/5

Today's Review: Memory Foam Pillows

As I lay in bed, thinking about what I could possibly review without having to leave my warm cocoon, it suddenly struck me. What helps me sleep every night? What supports me in my time of need? What is propping my head up right now so I can comfortably type this out? My memory foam pillow of course.

Many people I've talked to have not claimed to have a fondness for memory foam pillows. Too hard, they say. Too big, they say. But to those people, I say shut your dirty mouth. I've had feather pillows, I've had springy pillows, but they all pale in comparison to the big hunk of wonder that moulds perfectly to my head shape. Never have I had to pay down my pillow to force it back into a comfy arrangement, I've only ever turned it over for temperature purposes. Once my head hits this pillow, I find it extremely difficult to stay awake, but I'm holding on now for you guys. As for it being too big, I have pretty broad shoulders, so as someone who sleeps on his side this is really the only pillow that allows me to sleep without bending my neck downwards.

I love memory foam pillows. They lie in wait for me all day, and finally greet me with their firm, loving grasp to deliver me to the land of nod, and that is where I'm heading now.

My rating: 5/5

Today's Review: Primark's "Wooden Toy"

Some interesting things turn up in the bargain bins in Primark from time to time. This is one of those things. Well, I say interesting, but this one is more baffling to me. It's a wooden rendition of a Queen's Guard. With wheels. Also a hole in the middle.

Why the Queen's Guard? Were these surplus stock from the Jubilee three years ago? Okay, I get they could still be relevant, that uniform is iconically British. But then why the wheels? The Queen's Guard consists of people, with legs. I don't think I've ever seen one with wheels. Sure, it lets you push this little guy along, but you know what most kids like to push along? Cars. We already have many good objects with wheels, we don't need to go adding them to people willy nilly. 

Okay, I suppose I can see some of the appeal. It's a little different, and it's nice and colourful enough. But I still can't quite wrap my head round it. Since finding the thing, I have been informed that the hole in the middle functions as a good grip for the playful toddler, but I'm not sure if I buy that. There's just too much that doesn't make sense. Why the theme? Why the hole? Is the curved line on the face the helmet strap, a beaming smile, or both? Whatever the case, I returned the toy to its box, and left Primark confused. I'm likely reading too much into a simple toy, but hey, that's what I'm here for. So if you're looking for a Queen's Guard that you can drive around and post things through, check out your local Primark. For the other 99.9% of the population, I'd suggest getting your toys elsewhere.

My rating: 2/5

Today's Review: Toilet Seats

Toilet seats are seats that are attached to toilets. You use them to sit on said toilet. Well, if you didn't already know about toilet seats, I'd say you're up to speed now. Toilet seats can be a controversial topic, especially in the battle of the sexes. Does it go up, or down? Why can't we just move it ourselves? But we're not here to debate seat lifting etiquette, I'm here to discuss whether the seat is fit for purpose.

No matter which material a seat may come in, it's likely to do the job. No matter what the guys say, at some point we all make use of a toilet seat. I'm certainly glad for the extra butt room, instead of perching precariously on the rim of the toilet itself. Whoever invented the toilet only did half a job I say. Whoever invented the toilet seat was in touch with humanity. Unless the same person invented both, I don't know, I can't say I'm brushed up on my toilet history. Suffice it to say that toilet seats are awesome. We may take them for granted, but they're always there to lend their support. 

My rating: 5/5

Today's Review: The Trivial Pursuit Wedge

Is it cheese? Is it pie? Or is it even cake? The nature of the wedge has been long been debated, but in reality the form of food you associate it with is not important. The wedge is symbolic of something else, a victory in a struggle to answer a very specific question. Will it be the category of your choice? It doesn't matter, you need to get them all to win.

There are many versions of Trivial Pursuit, but the wedge is the same. Whether you're going for the classic, or a more specific edition like Disney or Lord Of The Rings, the wedge remains the same. It's an iconic piece of board game history. Not quite the same level as the die, but the die is representative of luck. The wedge is a testament to knowledge. Show anyone a Trivial Pursuit wedge and they'll know what it is, whether they love it or hate it. The wedge itself is unassuming, a well designed piece of board game history, and it deserves to be celebrated. As for me, I think it's pie.

My rating: 5/5

Today's Review: Pockets

What's in your pocket? Probably something, because we use pockets all the time. Phone, wallet, keys, gum, The One Ring, pockets can hold all kinds of wonderful items, ready for retrieval at a moment's notice. I use my pockets all the time, and it's only through some unfortunate wardrobe malfunction that I, on the odd occasion, find myself without any pockets. That is a glimpse into a dark alternate reality, a reality where pockets don't exist.

Can you imagine? A world where our clothing is flat and featureless, where its only functions are to cover our modesty, keep us warm, become accepted in social groups and attract a potential mate. What good is all that if we can't get our phones out of our pocket to post about it on social media? You may say we'd still have bags to put all our stuff in, but you know what a bag is? A big, standalone pocket. Without pockets, there may not even be any bags, and besides, I find bags unwieldy. I like to roam free, my pockets filled with whatever I may need that day, my shoulders swinging majestically, not anchored by straps and weight.

So yeah, pockets are great. I mean, sure, people can hide some nasty things in their pockets. For some reason John Wilkes Booth springs to mind, maybe if he didn't have pockets Abe Lincoln would still be alive today. But I think the benefits of pockets outweigh the nasty stuff. You can't extrapolate the actions of pocket extremists onto all those that use their pockets for peaceful purposes. Besides, everyone knows pockets are great. I certainly wouldn't want to live without them.

My rating: 5/5

Today's Review: The Improved IKEA Allen Keys

Well, Christmas is truly over, and now there's a mountain of toys that require storage in my tiny place. Our regular January tradition is to order a buttload of furniture from IKEA, so we can rearrange our rooms and maximise any storage potential we have. I love IKEA. They provide practical, simple, and cheap furniture. Sure, you may have to put it together yourself, but that's not really much of a problem. I've seen countless situations on TV and the like in which an inept man can't follow simple pictorial instructions, or there's a vital piece missing or left over, but I've never encountered any of those problems. 

No, my main concern has been with the allen keys provided. They're always moulded all the way down in that horrific hexagonal pattern, that drives into my flesh the more I screw, leaving my hands bruised and beaten after a lengthy furniture assembly session. I was fully prepared to review my excruciating ordeal with allen keys tonight, using my freshly mangled claw hands, but what should I see upon opening my flat packs? Improved allen keys!

Look at the craftsmanship on these babies. The hexagonal death grip is gone, replaced by a smooth, cylindrical handle that didn't hurt my hands at all. Sure, I got a little pain from the very end stages of screw tightening, but it's nowhere near as bad as the ordeal I used to suffer. To top it all off, check out that plastic doohickey surrounding the allen key at the top. That fell out of my largest piece of furniture, a spanner handle-like attachment that you can perfectly slot the allen key into for more leverage, plus plastic is certainly easier on the palms. So what I was expecting to be a painful, long lasting screwing experience was improved immeasurably by these well designed wonder tools. Well done IKEA, well done.

My rating: 5/5

Today's Review: Cubic Fun Burj Khalifa 3D Puzzle

So here's an interesting little gift I got for Christmas. I used to be really into Puzz 3D back in the day, and my parents bought me a few that I enjoyed putting together. I guess they remembered that, as they bought me one of these newfangled 3D puzzles, this one is in the shape of the Burj Khalifa, the tallest building in the world. That means it'll take a long time to put together, right?

Well, this isn't exactly a puzzle. It doesn't have small, interlocking, almost identical pieces like the monstrous Big Ben Puzz 3D I have stored away. Instead, the pieces come etched into several slabs, which you need to press out and then fasten together in a particular fashion. There's no real jigsaw puzzling involved, it's very much an elaborate tab A into slot B scenario, and the instructions and labelled pieces are there to help you every step of the way. 

Not that it's not fun to put together. I certainly whiled away an hour or two putting this thing together, and it's quite satisfying watching the layers build up to create the final model. Some pieces are a bit fiddly to slot into place, but it's not too taxing overall. The end result is pretty impressive, and it's currently standing at 81cm tall next to my TV. Not that it's going to stay there forever. It's a nice little conversation starter, sure, but that conversation would go like this:

Interested guest: "Ooh, what's that?"

Me: "It's a model of the Burj Khalifa, the tallest building in the world"

Fascinated guest: "Wow, have you been there?"

Me: "No."

Disinterested guest: "Oh."

But hey, if you've been to the Burj Khalifa, or just fancy starting up a display of self-assembled 3D models of famous buildings, you should be all over this. If neither of those apply, this is still a fun little thing to put together. It may not be as cool or challenging as the Millennium Falcon Puzz 3D I picked up at a charity shop a few weeks ago, but if you want a review of that you'll probably have to wait a couple of years for me to put it together...

My rating: 4/5

Today's Review: Christmas Crackers

Merry Christmas everybody, the time of year we embrace all manner of tradition. We drag trees into our living rooms, adorn them with sparkly things, wrap gifts in gaudy paper and leave a mince pie on a plate for a fictional fat guy. While most Christmas traditions are strange, I think there's one that beats them all, and that is the Christmas cracker.

Christmas dinner is a staple. We all need to have that slap up meal that brings the family together. But eating isn't enough, we have to bring these brightly coloured cardboard tubes into it, and with them come all kinds of dilemma. Who do we share our cracker with? Why is no one sharing their cracker with me? If the other person gets the bigger half, do they keep it or give it back? We don't need this kind of tension before a big family meal, but the cracker provides it, with an added bang to boot. 

It's not like crackers are important. You get a hat, sure, but only half the people at the table wear it (I don't because my head is too big, and also because I'm a terrible person). Apart from that, you may get a joke that makes everyone groan, and a trinket that you'll never use again. How many fortune telling fish, mini decks of cards and tiny padlocks does one person need? 

I'm not sure how crackers evolved to be a Christmas tradition, but it's certainly one of the strangest, and it just seems to be a way to squeeze more money out of everyone during the festive season. Sure, it's a little bit of fun, we all appreciate a terrible joke once in a while, and I like it when the banger doesn't work the first time, so I have to do it outside the tube. It makes it so much louder. I guess the appeal of crackers is purely in the tradition, it's something that brings families together, a bit of festive fun before tucking into a good meal. But that doesn't automatically make them fun. Crackers are weird.

My rating: 1/5