I took my son to the dentist today. It was a pretty standard visit, teeth checked and fine, a few minutes and it was over. But then we received the rewards that medical professionals like to give children for not screaming and destroying their things. Apparently the dentist used to give out lollipops, but now since the focus is on healthy children, and not repeat business, they get stickers. But not just stickers, oh no. Now they get the Nurdle Passport.
What's a Nurdle Passport? How could you possibly not know what a Nurdle Passport is? Well, I'll tell you. The Nurdle Passport is a booklet that you can take to your dentist every time your child has an appointment, so that they can stamp it and fill in details. It's like one of those child progress books, but purely for the medical wellbeing of your teeth. When your baby is grown up, you can show them all the walking and talking milestones they went through, the photo albums you've compiled and now all the times they went for a check up, thanks to this book filled with some odd little creatures called Nurdles.
Yes, the Nurdles are a gang of anthropomorphised squirts of Aquafresh toothpaste, and apparently they live in a place called "Nurdle World", which exists beyond the bathroom mirror. Thanks, Aquafresh. We already have the Easter Bunny, Father Christmas and even the Tooth Fairy to contend with, but now I have to stop my children trying to break my mirrors in order to access a fantasy fluoride world. I mean, I get it, they're cute little toothpaste splats, but if I had to think of a dentistry mascot, I'd probably go with toothbrushes or something. Or just not bother at all, because some things really don't need cutesy mascots.
I understand why the Nurdle Passport exists. It's a way to engage the kids, to give them a reward for something that can often terrify. But some things we go through are just inherently crappy. There's a comments section on every dentist check up in this book, but what can really be said? The very best thing is that the teeth were fine, but it can also be riddled with mention of cavities, misplaced teeth and wear and tear. I don't see any reason to keep an in depth record of dentist visits like this, especially with some baffling toothpaste mascots. While my son was only interested in the stickers for a while, some children may like this odd passport. But I really don't get it.
My rating: 2/5